Chris Brandt
I have a novel idea for resolving the dog/cyclist problem... Could be used
as a moneymaker for OBRA, a la "Gladiator"... Could be combined with the
Alpenrose Challenge event...
1. Collect dog and dog owner from said premises on Skyline Blvd. Separate.
2. Prepare Alpenrose velodrome with special snow fence barricades blocking
all exits from within the oval.
3. Place "Fido" in a suitable kennel carrier. Kennel to be located in center
of velodrome. Provide ample fresh water. (Caters to the dog lovers out
there). NO FOOD! Wait for 24 hours to ensure healthy appetite builds.
4. Dress dog owner in flashy spandex bike clothes, preferably with visible
logos reading ?Corben-Huntair?.
5. Lather newly dressed dog owner with canned dog food. Preferably lamb and
potato science diet. Make sure to get it behind the ears and in the chamois
to help prevent chafing. Heh, heh, heh...
6. Provide dog owner with track rental bike.
Rules: Rider gets one full lap to build up speed before Fido gets released.
Rider must make 25 complete laps.
Anticipated outcome: Eventually, Fido tires of chasing bikes or owner
realizes that a leash might be a better idea.
I?d pay to watch!
Chris
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Chris Brandt
2128 SE Hawthorne #23
Portland, OR 97214
home: (503) 232-3653
work: (503) 223-1171
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