OBRA: OBRA Chat: 'Cross-Commuters V. Roadie ...

T. Kenji Sugahara

2010-10-15

I think Mike was in his teens during the 1930's or something.

On Thu, Oct 14, 2010 at 3:42 PM, Rick Johnson wrote:
> Mike, I had no idea you were a cartoonist. Impressive how you drew that in a
> style that makes it look like it was 1930s or something...
>
> As for writing in French, you never cease to amaze!
>
> Rick
>
> Rick Johnson
> Bend, Oregon
>
> Every revolutionary idea seems to evoke three stages of reaction...
> One, it's completely impossible.
> Two, it's possible, but it's not worth doing.
> Three, I said it was a good idea all along.
>
> Arthur C. Clarke
>
> On 10/14/2010 3:37 PM, Mike Murray wrote:
>
> I guess I should let people know that the attachment to my previous message
> is safe to open.
>
>
>
> Mike Murray
>
>
>
> From: obra-bounces@list.obra.org [mailto:obra-bounces@list.obra.org] On
> Behalf Of Mike Murray
>
> Sent: Thursday, October 14, 2010 14:11 PM
> Cc: OBRA remailer
> Subject: Re: [OBRA Chat] 'Cross-Commuters V. Roadie Commuters
>
>
>
>
>
> Mike Murray - Sent via BlackBerry from T-Mobile
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: johnfforbes@comcast.net
> Sender: obra-bounces@list.obra.org
> Date: Thu, 14 Oct 2010 19:51:08
> To: Stephen Fitzgerald;
> Reply-To: johnfforbes@comcast.net
> Cc: OBRA
> Subject: Re: [OBRA Chat] 'Cross-Commuters V. Roadie Commuters
>
> Yeah, even though he is obviously wrong, everyone knows track riders are the
> true masters of the sport, the piece was a warm, humorous comment on the
> bike community.
> Sent from my Verizon Wireless BlackBerry
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: Stephen Fitzgerald
> Sender: obra-bounces@list.obra.org
> Date: Thu, 14 Oct 2010 12:13:58
> Cc:
> Subject: Re: [OBRA Chat] 'Cross-Commuters V. Roadie Commuters
>
> _______________________________________________
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> obra@list.obra.org
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>
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> ________________________________
>
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> Checked by AVG - www.avg.com
> Version: 10.0.1136 / Virus Database: 422/3196 - Release Date: 10/14/10
>
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>

--
Kenji Sugahara
Executive Director
Oregon Bicycle Racing Association
Phone: 503-278-5550
http://www.obra.org

Rick Johnson

2010-10-14

Mike, I had no idea you were a cartoonist. Impressive how you drew
that in a style that makes it look like it was 1930s or something...

As for writing in French, you never cease to amaze!

Rick

Rick Johnson
Bend, Oregon

Every revolutionary idea seems to evoke three stages of reaction...
One, it's completely impossible.
Two, it's possible, but it's not worth doing.
Three, I said it was a good idea all along.

Arthur C. Clarke

On 10/14/2010 3:37 PM, Mike Murray wrote:

Re: [OBRA Chat] 'Cross-Commuters V. Roadie Commuters



I guess I should let people know that the
attachment to my
previous message is safe to open.

Mike Murray

From:
obra-bounces@list.obra.org
[mailto:obra-bounces@list.obra.org] On Behalf Of Mike
Murray

Sent: Thursday, October 14, 2010 14:11 PM

Cc: OBRA remailer

Subject: Re: [OBRA Chat] 'Cross-Commuters V.
Roadie Commuters

Mike
Murray -
Sent via BlackBerry from T-Mobile

-----Original Message-----

From: johnfforbes@comcast.net

Sender: obra-bounces@list.obra.org

Date: Thu, 14 Oct 2010 19:51:08

To: Stephen Fitzgerald<list@monovich.com>;
<obra-bounces@list.obra.org>

Reply-To: johnfforbes@comcast.net

Cc: OBRA<OBRA@list.obra.org>

Subject: Re: [OBRA Chat] 'Cross-Commuters V. Roadie
Commuters

Yeah, even though he is obviously wrong, everyone knows
track riders are the
true masters of the sport, the piece was a warm, humorous
comment on the bike
community.

Sent from my Verizon Wireless BlackBerry

-----Original Message-----

From: Stephen Fitzgerald <list@monovich.com>

Sender: obra-bounces@list.obra.org

Date: Thu, 14 Oct 2010 12:13:58

Cc: <obra@list.obra.org>

Subject: Re: [OBRA Chat] 'Cross-Commuters V. Roadie
Commuters

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No virus found in this message.

Checked by AVG - www.avg.com

Version: 10.0.1136 / Virus Database: 422/3196 - Release Date:
10/14/10
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Mike Murray

2010-10-14

I guess I should let people know that the attachment to my previous message
is safe to open.

Mike Murray

From: obra-bounces@list.obra.org [mailto:obra-bounces@list.obra.org] On
Behalf Of Mike Murray
Sent: Thursday, October 14, 2010 14:11 PM
Cc: OBRA remailer
Subject: Re: [OBRA Chat] 'Cross-Commuters V. Roadie Commuters

Mike Murray - Sent via BlackBerry from T-Mobile

-----Original Message-----
From: johnfforbes@comcast.net
Sender: obra-bounces@list.obra.org
Date: Thu, 14 Oct 2010 19:51:08
To: Stephen Fitzgerald;
Reply-To: johnfforbes@comcast.net
Cc: OBRA
Subject: Re: [OBRA Chat] 'Cross-Commuters V. Roadie Commuters

Yeah, even though he is obviously wrong, everyone knows track riders are the
true masters of the sport, the piece was a warm, humorous comment on the
bike community.
Sent from my Verizon Wireless BlackBerry

-----Original Message-----
From: Stephen Fitzgerald
Sender: obra-bounces@list.obra.org
Date: Thu, 14 Oct 2010 12:13:58
Cc:
Subject: Re: [OBRA Chat] 'Cross-Commuters V. Roadie Commuters

_______________________________________________
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_____

No virus found in this message.
Checked by AVG - www.avg.com
Version: 10.0.1136 / Virus Database: 422/3196 - Release Date: 10/14/10

joec@aracnet.com

2010-10-14

Where are the bells???

On Thu, 14 Oct 2010 21:10:44 +0000, "Mike Murray"
wrote:
> Mike Murray - Sent via BlackBerry from T-Mobile
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: johnfforbes@comcast.net
> Sender: obra-bounces@list.obra.org
> Date: Thu, 14 Oct 2010 19:51:08
> To: Stephen Fitzgerald;
> Reply-To: johnfforbes@comcast.net
> Cc: OBRA
> Subject: Re: [OBRA Chat] 'Cross-Commuters V. Roadie Commuters
>
> Yeah, even though he is obviously wrong, everyone knows track riders
> are the true masters of the sport, the piece was a warm, humorous
> comment on the bike community.
> Sent from my Verizon Wireless BlackBerry
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: Stephen Fitzgerald
> Sender: obra-bounces@list.obra.org
> Date: Thu, 14 Oct 2010 12:13:58
> Cc:
> Subject: Re: [OBRA Chat] 'Cross-Commuters V. Roadie Commuters
>
> _______________________________________________
> OBRA mailing list
> obra@list.obra.org
> http://list.obra.org/mailman/listinfo/obra
> Unsubscribe: obra-unsubscribe@list.obra.org
>
> _______________________________________________
> OBRA mailing list
> obra@list.obra.org
> http://list.obra.org/mailman/listinfo/obra
> Unsubscribe: obra-unsubscribe@list.obra.org

Mike Murray

2010-10-14

Mike Murray - Sent via BlackBerry from T-Mobile

-----Original Message-----
From: johnfforbes@comcast.net
Sender: obra-bounces@list.obra.org
Date: Thu, 14 Oct 2010 19:51:08
To: Stephen Fitzgerald;
Reply-To: johnfforbes@comcast.net
Cc: OBRA
Subject: Re: [OBRA Chat] 'Cross-Commuters V. Roadie Commuters

Yeah, even though he is obviously wrong, everyone knows track riders are the true masters of the sport, the piece was a warm, humorous comment on the bike community.
Sent from my Verizon Wireless BlackBerry

-----Original Message-----
From: Stephen Fitzgerald
Sender: obra-bounces@list.obra.org
Date: Thu, 14 Oct 2010 12:13:58
Cc:
Subject: Re: [OBRA Chat] 'Cross-Commuters V. Roadie Commuters

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Mike Murray

2010-10-14

This is one of the most funny things I've seen about bike racers.
Mike Murray - Sent via BlackBerry from T-Mobile

-----Original Message-----
From: Wil Catlin
Sender: obra-bounces@list.obra.org
Date: Wed, 13 Oct 2010 14:28:21
To:
Subject: [OBRA Chat] 'Cross-Commuters V. Roadie Commuters

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Catlin, Wil

2010-10-14

No harm done at all - but oh man you JUMPED. Aha! Some true colors there, I think...:)

________________________________
From: obra-bounces@list.obra.org [mailto:obra-bounces@list.obra.org] On Behalf Of Ron and Dorothy Strasser
Sent: Thursday, October 14, 2010 1:18 PM
To: Stephen Fitzgerald
Cc: obra@list.obra.org
Subject: Re: [OBRA Chat] 'Cross-Commuters V. Roadie Commuters

I am sorry. Forgive me. I have been on pain relievers too long. I know. That is not an excuse.
ron
----- Original Message -----
From: Stephen Fitzgerald
Cc: obra@list.obra.org
Sent: Thursday, October 14, 2010 12:13 PM
Subject: Re: [OBRA Chat] 'Cross-Commuters V. Roadie Commuters

I thought it was a nice read. Clearly done with humor.
cheers.

On 10/14/2010 12:05 PM, Ron and Dorothy Strasser wrote:
I will only say you seem a bit sure of yourself and this belongs on the smack talk section of Cross Crusade where someone "might" care about what you "think". I might add it is not always good to believe what you "think".
ron
----- Original Message -----
From: Wil Catlin
To: obra@list.obra.org
Sent: Wednesday, October 13, 2010 2:28 PM
Subject: [OBRA Chat] 'Cross-Commuters V. Roadie Commuters

Autumn usually means three things: foggy morning commutes, BTA-inflated bike lane echelons, and (best of all) Roadie v. Crossie flame wars on OBRA chat. YES. Love those things. But what's up this year? Fog: check. BTA minions: check. Flame wars: nada, zip, zero. The best y'all can muster is to correct course lengths and propose alternate usages for membership cards. BORING. So let's take a new angle on this: from the perspective of a year-round bike commuter who's watched all the peaks and valleys of your periodized training from the bike lane, let me state for the record: 'cross commuters are SO LAME compared to roadie commuters! Yes, they totally are.

How am I certain I can correctly identify a 'cross commuter (and, therefore, assert so positively their lameness)? Can't believe you need to ask, as they are so clearly differentiated, starting from the jaunty little elbows of their cantilever brakes and their bald commuter tires (no cash left after buying fancy handmade disgust tubulars), to their preternaturally clean vinyl roll-top tube packs and Swurve capris hiked up just far enough on the drive-side to show their new calf tats. But most obvious is their combination of ferocity ("how can you tell you're in a cross race? You can see a cross bike") and utter lack of endurance. They skip to the front of stoplight lines nattering about their new call-up position after Heifer farms and sprint up bridge risers ("hill interval" in 'cross-ese) only to fade mid-span like Rasmussen in a headwind, clogging the lanes and muttering about pain caves. Just yesterday morning I was passed by a whole peloton (two) of these guys, drilling it up Hawthorne bridge in the pre-dawn gloom, their ant-blinkies visible from at least ten feet away. They took the heroic hole-clot onto the sidewalk single-track and promptly died over the slight deck rise into town, refusing to let folks pass even though we were jammed up on their wheels like so much Alpenlily mud. And it's not just bridges and lights that provoke these surge/sag cycles. Squirrel by the road? JUMP. Styling commuter in cowboy boots? JUMP. Sigh.

Makes me nostalgic for those Tuesday spring mornings when I'd tempo along Ankeny and stay far to the right while five-figure Colnagos passed me like sportscars on the autostrada, their pilots clad in Sisi carbon-soled shoes and Crooks bros. shirts, ties flipped casually back and one hand busy texting paralegal assistants about how they have to leave by 5:15 sharp to make their PIR start time and oh, could they track down the Raffi shipment that was supposed to come in yesterday? Good times. At least those guys could hold pace, even if they always slow down a little when passing so you can latch on, then slowly ramp up speed and drop you like a humiliated Albert in snow. Yeah, on the commuter front, Roadies have it all over the Crossis (one of them has got to stick...). Give me passive-aggressive commuting, any day.

Aw, who am I kidding: I love you all. Really. Except maybe for the Masters 50+ Intel commuters who have impossible outdoor-tans all year round, outsized calves and lungs, who insist on climbing through the zoo when Fairview is clearly quicker and less icy, and pass me in January going DOWN the backside of the 26 bike path, no matter how fast I pedal or try to ignore the fact that a chamois just does not provide adequate wind protection in sub-freezing weather ... those guys I only kinda' like!

Safe riding, everyone,
Wil

________________________________
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--

Stephen Fitzgerald

www.monovich.com/perpetualthree/

________________________________
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Ron and Dorothy Strasser

2010-10-14

I am sorry. Forgive me. I have been on pain relievers too long. I know. That is not an excuse.
ron
----- Original Message -----
From: Stephen Fitzgerald
Cc: obra@list.obra.org
Sent: Thursday, October 14, 2010 12:13 PM
Subject: Re: [OBRA Chat] 'Cross-Commuters V. Roadie Commuters

I thought it was a nice read. Clearly done with humor.
cheers.

On 10/14/2010 12:05 PM, Ron and Dorothy Strasser wrote:
I will only say you seem a bit sure of yourself and this belongs on the smack talk section of Cross Crusade where someone "might" care about what you "think". I might add it is not always good to believe what you "think".
ron
----- Original Message -----
From: Wil Catlin
To: obra@list.obra.org
Sent: Wednesday, October 13, 2010 2:28 PM
Subject: [OBRA Chat] 'Cross-Commuters V. Roadie Commuters

Autumn usually means three things: foggy morning commutes, BTA-inflated bike lane echelons, and (best of all) Roadie v. Crossie flame wars on OBRA chat. YES. Love those things. But what's up this year? Fog: check. BTA minions: check. Flame wars: nada, zip, zero. The best y'all can muster is to correct course lengths and propose alternate usages for membership cards. BORING. So let's take a new angle on this: from the perspective of a year-round bike commuter who’s watched all the peaks and valleys of your periodized training from the bike lane, let me state for the record: ‘cross commuters are SO LAME compared to roadie commuters! Yes, they totally are.

How am I certain I can correctly identify a ‘cross commuter (and, therefore, assert so positively their lameness)? Can’t believe you need to ask, as they are so clearly differentiated, starting from the jaunty little elbows of their cantilever brakes and their bald commuter tires (no cash left after buying fancy handmade disgust tubulars), to their preternaturally clean vinyl roll-top tube packs and Swurve capris hiked up just far enough on the drive-side to show their new calf tats. But most obvious is their combination of ferocity (“how can you tell you’re in a cross race? You can see a cross bike”) and utter lack of endurance. They skip to the front of stoplight lines nattering about their new call-up position after Heifer farms and sprint up bridge risers (“hill interval” in ‘cross-ese) only to fade mid-span like Rasmussen in a headwind, clogging the lanes and muttering about pain caves. Just yesterday morning I was passed by a whole peloton (two) of these guys, drilling it up Hawthorne bridge in the pre-dawn gloom, their ant-blinkies visible from at least ten feet away. They took the heroic hole-clot onto the sidewalk single-track and promptly died over the slight deck rise into town, refusing to let folks pass even though we were jammed up on their wheels like so much Alpenlily mud. And it's not just bridges and lights that provoke these surge/sag cycles. Squirrel by the road? JUMP. Styling commuter in cowboy boots? JUMP. Sigh.

Makes me nostalgic for those Tuesday spring mornings when I’d tempo along Ankeny and stay far to the right while five-figure Colnagos passed me like sportscars on the autostrada, their pilots clad in Sisi carbon-soled shoes and Crooks bros. shirts, ties flipped casually back and one hand busy texting paralegal assistants about how they have to leave by 5:15 sharp to make their PIR start time and oh, could they track down the Raffi shipment that was supposed to come in yesterday? Good times. At least those guys could hold pace, even if they always slow down a little when passing so you can latch on, then slowly ramp up speed and drop you like a humiliated Albert in snow. Yeah, on the commuter front, Roadies have it all over the Crossis (one of them has got to stick…). Give me passive-aggressive commuting, any day.

Aw, who am I kidding: I love you all. Really. Except maybe for the Masters 50+ Intel commuters who have impossible outdoor-tans all year round, outsized calves and lungs, who insist on climbing through the zoo when Fairview is clearly quicker and less icy, and pass me in January going DOWN the backside of the 26 bike path, no matter how fast I pedal or try to ignore the fact that a chamois just does not provide adequate wind protection in sub-freezing weather … those guys I only kinda’ like!

Safe riding, everyone,

Wil

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--
Stephen Fitzgerald
www.monovich.com/perpetualthree/

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

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johnfforbes@comcast.net

2010-10-14

Yeah, even though he is obviously wrong, everyone knows track riders are the true masters of the sport, the piece was a warm, humorous comment on the bike community.
Sent from my Verizon Wireless BlackBerry

-----Original Message-----
From: Stephen Fitzgerald
Sender: obra-bounces@list.obra.org
Date: Thu, 14 Oct 2010 12:13:58
Cc:
Subject: Re: [OBRA Chat] 'Cross-Commuters V. Roadie Commuters

_______________________________________________
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Unsubscribe: obra-unsubscribe@list.obra.org

Stephen Fitzgerald

2010-10-14

I thought it was a nice read. Clearly done with humor.
cheers.

On 10/14/2010 12:05 PM, Ron and Dorothy Strasser wrote:
> I will only say you seem a bit sure of yourself and this belongs on
> the smack talk section of Cross Crusade where someone "might" care
> about what you "think". I might add it is not always good to believe
> what you "think".
> ron
>
> ----- Original Message -----
> *From:* Wil Catlin
> *To:* obra@list.obra.org
> *Sent:* Wednesday, October 13, 2010 2:28 PM
> *Subject:* [OBRA Chat] 'Cross-Commuters V. Roadie Commuters
>
>
> Autumn usually means three things: foggy morning commutes,
> BTA-inflated bike lane echelons, and (best of all) Roadie v.
> Crossie flame wars on OBRA chat. YES. Love those things. But
> what's up this year? Fog: check. BTA minions: check. Flame wars:
> nada, zip, zero. The best y'all can muster is to correct course
> lengths and propose alternate usages for membership cards. BORING.
> So let's take a new angle on this: from the perspective of a
> year-round bike commuter who’s watched all the peaks and valleys
> of your periodized training from the bike lane, let me state for
> the record: ‘cross commuters are SO LAME compared to roadie
> commuters! Yes, they totally are.
>
> How am I certain I can correctly identify a ‘cross commuter (and,
> therefore, assert so positively their lameness)? Can’t believe you
> need to ask, as they are so clearly differentiated, starting from
> the jaunty little elbows of their cantilever brakes and their bald
> commuter tires (no cash left after buying fancy handmade disgust
> tubulars), to their preternaturally clean vinyl roll-top tube
> packs and Swurve capris hiked up just far enough on the drive-side
> to show their new calf tats. But most obvious is their combination
> of ferocity (“how can you tell you’re in a cross race? You can see
> a cross bike”) and utter lack of endurance. They skip to the front
> of stoplight lines nattering about their new call-up position
> after Heifer farms and sprint up bridge risers (“hill interval” in
> ‘cross-ese) only to fade mid-span like Rasmussen in a headwind,
> clogging the lanes and muttering about pain caves. Just yesterday
> morning I was passed by a whole peloton (two) of these guys,
> drilling it up Hawthorne bridge in the pre-dawn gloom, their
> ant-blinkies visible from at least ten feet away. They took the
> heroic hole-clot onto the sidewalk single-track and promptly died
> over the slight deck rise into town, refusing to let folks pass
> even though we were jammed up on their wheels like so much
> Alpenlily mud. And it's not just bridges and lights that provoke
> these surge/sag cycles. Squirrel by the road? JUMP. Styling
> commuter in cowboy boots? JUMP. Sigh.
>
> Makes me nostalgic for those Tuesday spring mornings when I’d
> tempo along Ankeny and stay far to the right while five-figure
> Colnagos passed me like sportscars on the autostrada, their pilots
> clad in Sisi carbon-soled shoes and Crooks bros. shirts, ties
> flipped casually back and one hand busy texting paralegal
> assistants about how they have to leave by 5:15 sharp to make
> their PIR start time and oh, could they track down the Raffi
> shipment that was supposed to come in yesterday? Good times. At
> least those guys could hold pace, even if they always slow down a
> little when passing so you can latch on, then slowly ramp up speed
> and drop you like a humiliated Albert in snow. Yeah, on the
> commuter front, Roadies have it all over the Crossis (one of them
> has got to stick…). Give me passive-aggressive commuting, any day.
>
> Aw, who am I kidding: I love you all. Really. Except maybe for the
> Masters 50+ Intel commuters who have impossible outdoor-tans all
> year round, outsized calves and lungs, who insist on climbing
> through the zoo when Fairview is clearly quicker and less icy, and
> pass me in January going DOWN the backside of the 26 bike path, no
> matter how fast I pedal or try to ignore the fact that a chamois
> just does not provide adequate wind protection in sub-freezing
> weather … those guys I only kinda’ like!
>
>
> Safe riding, everyone,
>
> Wil
>
>
> ------------------------------------------------------------------------
> _______________________________________________
> OBRA mailing list
> obra@list.obra.org
> http://list.obra.org/mailman/listinfo/obra
> Unsubscribe: obra-unsubscribe@list.obra.org
>
>
> _______________________________________________
> OBRA mailing list
> obra@list.obra.org
> http://list.obra.org/mailman/listinfo/obra
> Unsubscribe: obra-unsubscribe@list.obra.org

--
Stephen Fitzgerald
www.monovich.com/perpetualthree/

Ron and Dorothy Strasser

2010-10-14

I will only say you seem a bit sure of yourself and this belongs on the smack talk section of Cross Crusade where someone "might" care about what you "think". I might add it is not always good to believe what you "think".
ron
----- Original Message -----
From: Wil Catlin
To: obra@list.obra.org
Sent: Wednesday, October 13, 2010 2:28 PM
Subject: [OBRA Chat] 'Cross-Commuters V. Roadie Commuters

Autumn usually means three things: foggy morning commutes, BTA-inflated bike lane echelons, and (best of all) Roadie v. Crossie flame wars on OBRA chat. YES. Love those things. But what's up this year? Fog: check. BTA minions: check. Flame wars: nada, zip, zero. The best y'all can muster is to correct course lengths and propose alternate usages for membership cards. BORING. So let's take a new angle on this: from the perspective of a year-round bike commuter who’s watched all the peaks and valleys of your periodized training from the bike lane, let me state for the record: ‘cross commuters are SO LAME compared to roadie commuters! Yes, they totally are.

How am I certain I can correctly identify a ‘cross commuter (and, therefore, assert so positively their lameness)? Can’t believe you need to ask, as they are so clearly differentiated, starting from the jaunty little elbows of their cantilever brakes and their bald commuter tires (no cash left after buying fancy handmade disgust tubulars), to their preternaturally clean vinyl roll-top tube packs and Swurve capris hiked up just far enough on the drive-side to show their new calf tats. But most obvious is their combination of ferocity (“how can you tell you’re in a cross race? You can see a cross bike”) and utter lack of endurance. They skip to the front of stoplight lines nattering about their new call-up position after Heifer farms and sprint up bridge risers (“hill interval” in ‘cross-ese) only to fade mid-span like Rasmussen in a headwind, clogging the lanes and muttering about pain caves. Just yesterday morning I was passed by a whole peloton (two) of these guys, drilling it up Hawthorne bridge in the pre-dawn gloom, their ant-blinkies visible from at least ten feet away. They took the heroic hole-clot onto the sidewalk single-track and promptly died over the slight deck rise into town, refusing to let folks pass even though we were jammed up on their wheels like so much Alpenlily mud. And it's not just bridges and lights that provoke these surge/sag cycles. Squirrel by the road? JUMP. Styling commuter in cowboy boots? JUMP. Sigh.

Makes me nostalgic for those Tuesday spring mornings when I’d tempo along Ankeny and stay far to the right while five-figure Colnagos passed me like sportscars on the autostrada, their pilots clad in Sisi carbon-soled shoes and Crooks bros. shirts, ties flipped casually back and one hand busy texting paralegal assistants about how they have to leave by 5:15 sharp to make their PIR start time and oh, could they track down the Raffi shipment that was supposed to come in yesterday? Good times. At least those guys could hold pace, even if they always slow down a little when passing so you can latch on, then slowly ramp up speed and drop you like a humiliated Albert in snow. Yeah, on the commuter front, Roadies have it all over the Crossis (one of them has got to stick…). Give me passive-aggressive commuting, any day.

Aw, who am I kidding: I love you all. Really. Except maybe for the Masters 50+ Intel commuters who have impossible outdoor-tans all year round, outsized calves and lungs, who insist on climbing through the zoo when Fairview is clearly quicker and less icy, and pass me in January going DOWN the backside of the 26 bike path, no matter how fast I pedal or try to ignore the fact that a chamois just does not provide adequate wind protection in sub-freezing weather … those guys I only kinda’ like!

Safe riding, everyone,

Wil

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Wil Catlin

2010-10-13

Autumn usually means three things: foggy morning commutes, BTA-inflated bike
lane echelons, and (best of all) Roadie v. Crossie flame wars on OBRA chat.
YES. Love those things. But what's up this year? Fog: check. BTA minions:
check. Flame wars: nada, zip, zero. The best y'all can muster is to correct
course lengths and propose alternate usages for membership cards. BORING. So
let's take a new angle on this: from the perspective of a year-round bike
commuter who’s watched all the peaks and valleys of your periodized training
from the bike lane, let me state for the record: ‘cross commuters are SO
LAME compared to roadie commuters! Yes, they totally are.

How am I certain I can correctly identify a ‘cross commuter (and, therefore,
assert so positively their lameness)? Can’t believe you need to ask, as they
are so clearly differentiated, starting from the jaunty little elbows of
their cantilever brakes and their bald commuter tires (no cash left after
buying fancy handmade disgust tubulars), to their preternaturally clean
vinyl roll-top tube packs and Swurve capris hiked up just far enough on the
drive-side to show their new calf tats. But most obvious is their
combination of ferocity (“how can you tell you’re in a cross race? You can
see a cross bike”) and utter lack of endurance. They skip to the front of
stoplight lines nattering about their new call-up position after Heifer
farms and sprint up bridge risers (“hill interval” in ‘cross-ese) only to
fade mid-span like Rasmussen in a headwind, clogging the lanes and muttering
about pain caves. Just yesterday morning I was passed by a whole peloton
(two) of these guys, drilling it up Hawthorne bridge in the pre-dawn gloom,
their ant-blinkies visible from at least ten feet away. They took the heroic
hole-clot onto the sidewalk single-track and promptly died over the slight
deck rise into town, refusing to let folks pass even though we were jammed
up on their wheels like so much Alpenlily mud. And it's not just bridges and
lights that provoke these surge/sag cycles. Squirrel by the road? JUMP.
Styling commuter in cowboy boots? JUMP. Sigh.

Makes me nostalgic for those Tuesday spring mornings when I’d tempo along
Ankeny and stay far to the right while five-figure Colnagos passed me like
sportscars on the autostrada, their pilots clad in Sisi carbon-soled shoes
and Crooks bros. shirts, ties flipped casually back and one hand busy
texting paralegal assistants about how they have to leave by 5:15 sharp to
make their PIR start time and oh, could they track down the Raffi shipment
that was supposed to come in yesterday? Good times. At least those guys
could hold pace, even if they always slow down a little when passing so you
can latch on, then slowly ramp up speed and drop you like a humiliated
Albert in snow. Yeah, on the commuter front, Roadies have it all over the
Crossis (one of them has got to stick…). Give me passive-aggressive
commuting, any day.

Aw, who am I kidding: I love you all. Really. Except maybe for the Masters
50+ Intel commuters who have impossible outdoor-tans all year round,
outsized calves and lungs, who insist on climbing through the zoo when
Fairview is clearly quicker and less icy, and pass me in January going DOWN
the backside of the 26 bike path, no matter how fast I pedal or try to
ignore the fact that a chamois just does not provide adequate wind
protection in sub-freezing weather … those guys I only kinda’ like!

Safe riding, everyone,

Wil