Robbins, Kyle
You might be a roadie if ...
You can identify bugs by their taste.
You not only know the phone number for your local bike shop
by heart, but can usually hum along with the music they play
when they put you on hold.
You meet a beautiful girl dressed in skin-tight spandex and
one of the first ten words out of your mouth is either "Shimano"
or "Campagnolo."
Your entire knowledge of French consists of phrases like
"maillot jaune," "lantern rouge," and "peleton."
You find yourself noticing, (and being irritated by), one or more of
the following about other riders:
- cadence too low
- seat post too low
- frame too large
You've ever used a bit of roadie slang around family or
coworkers who have no idea what you're talking about. You know, "I
would have finished-up that project last night, but I bonked hard at
11:00."
You find yourself trying to disengage your clipless pedals
when
moving Your foot off the clutch in your car.
If you point out obstacles in the road while driving your
car
If you scare passengers in your car by yelling "stopping!'
at red lights
Your most expensive clothes say Pearl Izumi on them
You know your max heart rate but not your IQ
If the value of your bikes is greater than the value of
your car.
You've been asked not to return to an 'all you can eat'
restaurant.
You can build up three bikes from all the parts lying
around your house.
You have more wheels than suits.
You flunked high school chemistry yet you can discuss EPO
and its implications convincingly with a pulmonologist.
You have bookmarked more cycling related websites than
nudie websites.
You have ever used tubular cement for household
repairs.....
You have ever been driving the car and reached down for
your waterbottle....
You wear Briko Stingers in public....while OFF of the
bike....
You think that the 4 major food groups are Power Bar,
Cytomax, Gatorade, and fig newtons
You think that riding a mountain bike can lead to the abuse
of harder drugs....
You think that Phil Liggett should be nominated for the
Edgar R. Morrow Award
You think that Christopher Columbus was named after the
tubing company
You can remember Campagnolo part numbers, but not your
anniversary date
You find yourself grasping the handle of a shopping cart as
if it were the brake-hoods of your bike.
You have Colorado Cyclist catalogs instead of Playboy in
the bathroom.
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